Draw Near: The Challenge of Conversation

I grew up in a house with a lot of talking and noise.

It was the norm to ask questions and also the norm to be honest when you had no idea what the answer was to any given question.

I didn’t realize the impact of this until just a few years ago when I started doing therapy with families.

In some houses, questions are OK.

In other houses, questions are not OK.

In some houses, questions are allowed on any given topic.

In other houses, questions are allowed but there are certain topics which are faux pas.

noun, plural faux pas [foh pahz; French foh pah] /foʊ ˈpɑz; French foʊ ˈpɑ/.

a slip or blunder in etiquette, manners, or conduct; an embarrassing social blunder or indiscretion.*

Now, my household growing up had lots of issues. We were just as messed up at the rest of you, have no fear. However, I have learned that the ability to ask questions, any questions is a cornerstone to allowing grace into our homes. Being able to have a place to put the difficult things, the doubts, and the concerns, as well as the simple curiosities which life brings up all the time, is a really important piece to our spiritual, mental, and relational health.

Hearing and asking questions are some of the ways to release shame from our lives, particularly in those safe places - family, deep friendships, any connections that allow us to be vulnerable and return grace in allowing vulnerability for the other person.

God does not shame us for our questions.

He enjoys conversation.

God spoke to Adam and Eve in the Garden, to Moses by way of a bush and on a mountain, to Jonah by a tree, to Esther through Mordecai, and even Nebuchadnezzar through Daniel and a hand that wrote along a wall. Then, He sent Jesus to gather fishermen on a beach to hear and learn, invite children to ask, learn, and grow on His lap, and reach out to women to open homes and create spaces, asking questions, and be included in the conversation.

Now, we have the Bible. We open it up and let the questions pour out. We gather around a table or with mugs of coffee, reclining on couches, opening our thoughts and wonderings to one another around a book collected millennia ago, but alive and active in our lives today, this day.

The problem is all those fears and frustrations and expectations we have gathered up from our families, from friends, from cultural ideas, and even from TV shows have shaped our vision of what God wants from us, rather than gathering that vision from God Himself. These ideas and internal or external fears couple with busyness and fatigue, and we end up stuffing our questions and thoughts for God down deep, last priority, or safe from someone’s judgement, including what we might perceive to be God’s.

Remember:

God does not shame us for our questions.

He enjoys conversation.

It’s time to embrace, or re-embrace, drawing near.

I recently wrote this article for Concordia Publishing House, which includes four creative ways to engage in the practice of drawing near to God. Drawing near doesn’t need to look like these things, but they are intended to get us going.

How do you like to draw near to God? How do you open the conversation lines to Him, for yourself, or your household? How do you make yourself aware of His presence, His Spirit, His Son’s work in your daily life?

Perhaps you need some encouragement to embrace drawing near, or re-embrace drawing near. We all do, on any given day, that’s for sure!

Join the Draw Near Challenge

Here’s what you do -

Step One:

Read the 4 Ways to Draw Near article here:

Step Two:

Choose one of the four creative ways to draw near and engage in it for seven days straight.

That’s it!

Optional Step Three:

Share your story of drawing near with us using this form. Share your story any time before Easter Sunday 2019 for a chance to win an I Love My Shepherd study.

Keep your eye on ilovemyshepherd social media in the coming weeks for more on Drawing Near and some Drawing Near encouragement. You can follow me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, or SnapChat.

In the end, whether you do the challenge or not, take a moment today to Draw Near. We have an Altogether Beautiful God, who invites us in and draws us in with love and kindness. He is always ready for our questions. He can handle our doubts, fears, and frustrations, and He loves a good conversation.

Draw Near.

*attribution: dictionary.com